What the hell's that on your top lip?
Whatever it is it looks like shit
In an age of man with teenage hair
And every girl avoids your stair

Antisocial facial hair shave your face
Antisocial facial hair male disgrace
Don't be bold don't be brash
Just shave off that antisocial tash

Months of growing you can't even bic it
Go to plan b and get the cat to lick it
Women laugh in your face they don't want a snide
They want a real man like Magnum PI

No dad hormones he's to blame
Rem Russ Broomo bow in shame
Kevin webster from dead stop
When you cough your slug falls off

Hang up your boots
There's nothing you can do
Face the facts you're screwed
Gluing pubes to your face last chance saloon
Only one thing left to do
And that's thrash
Thrash with a small moustache